To build on my previous thought about preserving my heritage. I need to start writing, seriously and in a sustained manner, about my heritage. It is not just for me, but for the future. For those who will come after me. Others may benefit from it as well. My roots are long and rich and grow strong, they are firmly planted and that is what gives me my sense of self and my understanding of where I am and where I need to be. The many varied aspects to my existence are all steered towards the vortex which is my legacy. My great-great grandmother's face beckons me. Calls out to me-- I must do what I was sent here to do. I have a purpose, I have to fullfil it. when opportunity breaks it is the greatest feeling in the world, however when it is closed and there is no possibility in sight one can dip down into the uttermost despair. There is always light and one must be patient while wanting to see it, and always remember to breathe. The rich iron ore color of skin which is the norm amongst my relatives (the Deramuses, children of John Archie that is, even though attributable to my Goodson forbears) is the wisdom of their souls playing out into their physical bodies. My skin, the wealth of its color, the naturaleness of my hair--are what is instilled in me by my ancestors. My uncle lawrence was darker- his skin was a rich soot color that hinted red- like the soil that grows beautiful crops and that provided harvest for my ancestors and my family. I am swallowed whole by my legacy. I ama left at peace in the knowledge of who I am and what I need to be, sucking the nutrients that sustain me from roots that are firmly planted in the ground.